.           all rights belong to Tanis Harms –
.             refer to
www.church-skits.com

PASTOR AND WIFE APPRECIATION SKITS
.                                – written by Tanis Harms
TOPIC:        prayer, consideration
SCRIPTURE:    Eph.6:18-20; 1Thess.5:11; 1Tim.3:1-16;
.             Heb.3:13, 13:17
Style:        comedy/conversation: as narrator gives
.             an appreciation speech, skits are
.             played out which illustrate situations
.             that pastors and their wives sometimes
.             might have to endure with love and grace
Cast:         PASTOR, WIFE, MAN 1-3, WOMAN 1-4
.             (or have one man and one women, etc.
.              change costumes/hats in order to be
.              all the various characters)
Set & Props:  different hats for MEN and WOMEN,
.             cellphone

SCRIPT:

(NARRATOR stands to one side of the stage,
while each illustration happens on the other side.)

NARRATOR   As we love our pastor (pastors)
.          and his family (their families),
.          we thought it would be such a great idea
.          to SHOW just how much we appreciate them
.          through these illustration bits that we found
.          in a skit - on just some - random website,
.          which demonstrates the close relationships
.          pastors get to enjoy with their congregation
.          members.  We understand that a pastor’s
.          entire purpose is to guide, and nurture, and -
.          drill those scriptures into our thick skulls -
.          WITH the most LOVING methods possible.
.          Not the easiest job in the world to do.
.          But not only are they human beings themselves,
.          they are devoted, godly people with
.          a deep understanding of things, which
.          enables them to help people through
.          various and sometimes serious tragedies.

(PASTOR enters.  WOMAN 1 rushes on, waving her hand
in the air to get his attention.)

WOMAN 1    Oh, yoo-hooo, pastor! I need urgent prayer.  2

(PASTOR stops to listen as WOMAN 1 doesn’t
stop for breath.)

WOMAN 1    It has been the most trying day.
.          I know Satan is hard at work
.          trying to discourage me.  It all began
.          when I was trying to make cookies
.          for the Sunday School bake sale.
.          The telephone rang, and while I endured
.          the persecution of the telemarketers,
.          my cookies burned to a crisp.
.          Now I’m forced to bring store-bought-cookies
.          which will tarnish my reputation forever.
.          I am distraught with despair.  You’ve NO idea!

PASTOR     Yes.  I – ah - cannot begin to imagine-

WOMAN 1    I could really use some prayer right now!

PASTOR     Indeed.

(PASTOR folds his hands with an understanding nod,
then leads the way out, followed by WOMAN 1.)

NARRATOR   Even though it is difficult, there are times
.          a pastor needs to exercise discernment
.          as well as forgiveness.

(PASTOR enters followed by MAN 1 who talks entire time.  
PASTOR stops to face man, who still continues to talk.)

MAN 1      Something must be done.  The music was way
.          too loud last week, then this week- too quiet.
.          Lights- way too dark! Couldn’t see the buttons
.          on my cellphone.  But if it’s too bright, then
.          a person feels very exposed.  Like when your
.          sermons have too much truth in it.  Yeah, your
.          sermons need a bit of work.  They shouldn’t be
.          too short, or they won’t seem spiritual enough
.          but they should be short enough so we can beat
.          the lineups at the diner.  Which brings me to
.          the issue of those potluck fellowship meals.
.          I’m thinking, we should be able to request
.          which dishes should never be brought here
.          ever again.  Like Annie’s pepperoni soup-
.                                                       3
PASTOR     I’m so sorry - that you are not experiencing
.          contentment in life.  Why don’t you follow me
.          and we can talk about a few ways
.          to address that.

(PASTOR exits, with MAN 1 first balking, then following.)

NARRATOR   And all the while, being ready to encourage.

(PASTOR exits, followed by MAN 1 again.)

MAN 1      Something must be done.  The music was way
.          too loud again, and another week- too quiet.

PASTOR     Isn’t it awesome to have a worship team
.          that provides such a variety of music?

(PASTOR says that nicely, with a nod, then exits.
MAN 1 balks, then follows with bewilderment.)

MAN 1      Ah, yeah, I guess.

NARRATOR   In certain situations, it is probably hard
.          to comprehend how blessed we are to have
.          pastors willing to act as peacemakers.

(PASTOR enters, followed by WOMAN 2.)

WOMAN 2    So THEN Nancy said that I was being rude.
.          Me!  Can you believe it?  And she goes
.          on and on and just won’t let it go!
.          I’ve tried to work it out with her in private
.          to make her see that it’s all her fault.
.          So now I want the elders to step in.
.          What she did was unforgiveable!
.          She needs to be punished.

PASTOR     I am just curious-

(WOMAN 2 becomes very attentive, happy to think
that the pastor will take her side.)

PASTOR     Would you be able to throw a stone at Nancy
.          without feeling any guilt?

(WOMAN 2 gasps then sighs as she self-assesses.)
.                                                       4
WOMAN 2    (muttering)  I will – CONSIDER that.

(PASTOR exits.  WOMAN 2 exits in the other direction.)

NARRATOR   A pastor always cares.

(PASTOR enters followed by MAN 2.  Both keep walking
to other side while talking, then exit.)

MAN 2      So Pastor, what do you think?  Do you think
.          the locust in Revelation would be helicopters?

PASTOR     That could be possible, or it could be
.          an actual description.

NARRATOR   A pastor is always gracious.

(PASTOR enters followed by MAN 2.  Both keep walking
back to other side while talking, then exit.)

MAN 2      And, what about the horses with the
.          snake tails?  Those COULD BE tanks, right?

PASTOR     Or, it could be an actual description.

NARRATOR   And a pastor is always working on patience.

(PASTOR enters followed by MAN 2.  Both keep walking
to other side while talking, then exit.)

MAN 2      Oh, and pastor, about that dragon!
.          Do you really think there’s an actual dragon
.          with multiple heads?

PASTOR     Why don’t you follow me?  I have a few books
.          in my office that you might want to read.

(PASTOR and MAN 2 exit.)

NARRATOR   A pastor learns to depend on God’s wisdom
.          in every circumstance.

(PASTOR enters, and is met by WOMAN 3.)

PASTOR     Hello, Angela.  And how are you doing?

WOMAN 3    Well!  If you really must know-              5
.          I am so busy with the women’s ministry,
.          I just don’t know what to do with myself.
.          I’m not sure if you’ve ever felt that way,
.          like you don’t know which way to turn,
.          and trying to find people to do what you need
.          is like pulling teeth.  Am I right?
.          But it’s like my baby, and I just want to see
.          this ministry grow and flourish.

PASTOR     If it’s too much - we can always –
.          cut that baby in half and divide up the work-

WOMAN 3    Oh!  No, that’s okay.  It’s not THAT busy.
.          Really.  But, thanks for the concern.

(WOMAN 3 rushes off.  PASTOR stops to check
cellphone messages while NARRATOR speaks.)

NARRATOR   Pastors are expected to point us toward
.          the heartbeat of God each and every Sunday,
.          as well as throughout the entire week, without
.          ever tiring.  And so, they are extremely
.          selfless, and generous with time and energy.

(MAN 3 enters and sees PASTOR.)

MAN 3      Oh, there you are.  We’d like you to speak
.          at the men’s breakfast this Saturday.

(WOMAN 4 rushes on.)

WOMAN 4    Except that Saturday is our daughter’s wedding
.          so he’ll be busy with that.

MAN 3      But not until what time?

WOMAN 4    Two o’clock.

(PASTOR looks back at cellphone.)

PASTOR     I have an eleven a.m. appointment.

(PASTOR starts to exit, followed by MAN 3 and WOMAN 4)

MAN 3      That should be good.  The breakfast
.          will be over by that time.
.                                                       6
NARRATOR   And let’s not forget the pastor’s wife!
.          (pastors’ wives!)

(PASTOR’S WIFE enters and walks across the stage
in the direction which would be to find the PASTOR.  
She is met by MAN 3, and WOMAN 4.)

MAN 3      Is that the pastor’s wife?

WOMAN 4    Oh, I need to talk to her first.

MAN 3      (catching up to WIFE)  Hey!

WOMAN 4    How are you?

MAN 3      I was hoping you’d be able to open up
.          with a word of prayer at the
.          missionaries’ fund raising banquet?

WOMAN 4    I hope that’s not on the same night
.          as our committee meeting.

(ALL have exited as they usher WIFE.)

NARRATOR   And as a couple, they find the time
.          to work on having a strong, healthy marriage.

(PASTOR and WIFE enter, followed by MAN 3 and WOMAN 4.)

MAN 3      Where are you two going?

PASTOR     We have a dinner date.

WOMAN 4    Oh yes, happy anniversary!

MAN 3      Yes-ditto.  Now, I know it’s after hours,
.          but could you quickly go over this?

NARRATOR   Now, wait- hold on just a minute there.
.          Ahhhh...

(MAN 3 and WOMAN 4 freeze, then glance over at NARRATOR.  
NARRATOR motions for PASTOR and WIFE to quickly exit in
one direction, then blocks the path of MAN 3 and WOMAN 4
and motions for them to exit in the other direction
while they steal glances over their shoulders.)
.                                                       7
NARRATOR   So, yeeeaaah, all this stuff can possibly
.          happen at times.  Although, I’m fairly sure,
.          that NONE of this ever happens in OUR church -
.          but this is why we need - and want –
.          to be encouraging and constantly praying
.          for our pastor/s and their families.
.          And we certainly hope that they feel
.          our appreciation for them each and every day.